have you ever felt like your arm was missing but you still feel pain when it aches and aches but its not there? have you ever spent much of your adult life with one person who knows everything about you and still accepts and loves you anyway? have you ever felt internal pain from losing said person? have you ever cried from somewhere in your soul that you didnt even know existed? have you ever been at a loss for words because there are no words to describe the deep deep pit of immense sorrow you feel? have you ever had people judge you because they are on the outside looking in and and have never lost someone themselves before? have you ever had to take abuse from those who love you?have you ever tried to give medicine to a person who doesnt want to take it? have you ever had a doctor tell you theres nothing left he can do, your loved one is gonna die? have you ever had someone purposely hurt your feelings because they wanted to be in your shoes? have you ever felt dizzy and couldnt think straight but still have to feed your children and pay the bills? have you ever cried for days on end because you miss your husband? have you ever heard songs on the radio and feel like every one of them is speaking to your life,love, and experiences? have you ever gone somewhere and remember your husband took you there or you ate dinner together or anniversary was celebrated there? have you ever gotten into your car and all you can think is he should be driving today? have you ever had to put up curtains with his tools? have you ever had to look at your children and see him in them? have you ever had to do many many things on your own, even though you've done things on your own before, but now its different because you dont even have the option anymore? have you ever looked at birthday cards, just because cards, and letters and wished that you could see your husband again to tell him that you appreciate all that he did? have you ever had to pay off his bills, settle his estate, fight bill collectors, take care of kids, go to school, grieve, go to court, find a place to live, deal with bullshit, live in a hotel, and do all of the above with a smile?have you ever??? please tell me because ....
i miss him so much...

My aura is RED

stands for emotions passionate or RAGE!!

SO TRUE....

did anyone see I Am Legend...

excellent movie, i recommend it for anyone looking to see a movie that makes you think about the state of our human affairs and what we are doing to fix things here on this round orb we call Earth!!!!! Also, the recent movie by M. Night Shymalan...DEEP!!! yall, check that....

that's all for now...until next time...

same bat time, same bat channel...

Scientists have recently discovered that no matter what the cause, all forms of grief create physical pain and chemical reactions in our body.  In other words, grief in any form takes a measurable toll on us physically, one that can actually be quantified and seen in laboratories.  The second interesting thing about these studies is that grief over the loss of loved one,  whether human or animal,  both measured the same identical effects  in the body.  So whether we are grieving a spouse, or a beloved animal companion the effects in our bodies are equal.  That is an important finding because it offers us an opportunity to have more compassion for ALL those who grieve, not just those we can relate to, or those losses we deem 'worthy.'  It's a huge opportunity for a lesson in compassion and expanding our inadequate models for understanding grief.

Initially, grief must be experienced and respected as primal, where our very survival hinges on ebbing and flowing with this process far greater than ourselves.  Eventually though, it's important to start seeing grief for what it is on a larger level...sacred work for the soul.   By grieving the loss of a loved one we ultimately invite our own healing and soul progress...making room for new understanding, acceptance, clarity and compassion to come in.  And with all this comes a better communication with The Other Side, not a weakened one.

Remember, we humans have to flow everything through our egos.  The ego would have us think we are in control, we are the center of The Universe, we are different than others, better than others, not like others, exempt from suffering, above loss etc....and guess what?  The ego is a big illusion artist, a great fibber!  Ego is a human condition.  It means we are focused or fixated on ourselves:   I this, I that.  But our soul doesn't work this way.  The ego or id is part of the earthly package, not the eternal one. When we find ways to move through our grief and become even slightly aware of a bigger picture, there is comfort in knowing that despite appearances everything is always working for good - for our growth.  Everything is leading us somewhere.  Eventually, as spirits, we will all meet again.  And in the scheme of The Universe, that's just a blink of the eye.

Laura Scott, spiritual teacher